( First off, are you fuckin’ serious? Who are you, your father now? I don’t need you making drug references lil girl.

Anyhow, I’m gonna address some stuff from your message. 

You’ve known me since Junior year; three damned years. And that message makes it sound like you don’t know me at all. I’m mean to you, but sweet to my other friends? W h a t? I tackle Kristan to the couch without any care for her safety and kept loudly calling her a ‘creepy lesbian’ at that concert you missed out on. I called Jessica a little shit daily and pinched her butt with no tenderness. I literally stabbed Shane in the leg with a pencil. And you tell me I’m sweet to my other friends? That is not sweet, that is cruel as fuck. 

You should know better than anyone else ( besides maybe Kristan ) that I am just like my mum; if I love you, I’m mean to you. Lo and behold! I’m mean to you! I wonder what that means, hm?

Are you talking about my online friends? Because if they met me in person, I’d be mean to them, too. It’s who I am.

Yes, I am meaner to you than I am everyone else excluding Kristan. But you know what? I take care of you better than your own mother; I don’t do that for anyone else. I spoil you with pho and pocky among other things. I care for you when you’re sick. ( which is rare, but I still do. ) I used to spend all my money buying supplies for pho just so I could make a pot at your house and leave it for you when I left on Sunday. 

I fret about you like no other. Like, shit, I swear the majority of my grey hairs are from you and you alone. You are literally the child I will never have, and I’m serious when I say I will do a lot for you. Defend you, protect you, hell if you’re lucky I’d die for you if it ever came down to it. 

I’m mean to you because someone has to be. Someone has to push you to do things that you would be slow to do in the first place. Someone has to know that you will do them with a little encouragement and you know what? That’s my task; my job in this friendship is to be the bitch. The supportive, motherly bitch. 

And that’s why I tell you to be kind. When you give attitude and act rude, then you’re acting just like me. And you don’t want to, trust me. Be sweet and gentle; you will attract so many bees with honey, not vinegar. Don’t be bitter like me; it’s not a good thing.

So yes, I’m mean to you. And yes, I know I take it too far sometimes and I’m sorry. But I do it because I love you and because I want you to have the best of things in life, and that requires effort that you need to move your butt and give.

I love you, you little shit. And maybe things will smooth out once we move ( that’s if you still plan on moving with me ) and get better because we’ll be on our own and we’ll be adults. 

… Besides, at least I don’t stab you with pencils. )